( voice; )

[shadesofred]

I think this is a long overdue announcement. My girly heart just can't bear this secret anymore! Or something stupid like that. My heart's actually been still for like, a thousand years now, so it's more full of coagulated blood and maggots than secrets. But I guess that's why it can't bear it anymore! It's too frail from all the creepy-crawlies eating it!

[ She is having way too much fun with this. Actually, she usually has fun with elaborate blackmail schemes, but it's been a while since she's had a whole audience to mess with. Marceline gives a dramatic sigh––you know, the kind you'd hear from the ~damsel in distress~ in a particularly old movie. ]

World, get ready for a shocker, because here it comes: I, Marceline the Vampire Queen, am the girlfriend of Sadiq What's-his-Face.

[ From the way she's talking, you can pretty much imagine her doing this. ]

He's just as scrumptious as a strawberry cupcake! Underneath his jerky exterior, there's a man with a heart of gold and cinnamon and whatever else you can imagine that's awesome. We hold hands all the time. It's fantabulous. I don't even mind that he's so sweaty.

So why am I telling you all this? Oh, no reason! Just thought I'd bring a little light into your dismal lives. And to prove that not all vampires are heartless maneaters. I'm sure my schnookems will readily agree.

[ Yeah she's semi up to date on current events. Hey, may as well make the most of this arrangement. (Not that she really cares if people view her badly but some days it's good to know that garlic won't be thrown at you.) ]

That's all. You can all continue on with your daily routines now.

Comments

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

I do not care who you are. I do not care if you do not like me.

This is important.

[video]

[shadesofred]

The name's Marceline. The Vampire Queen. Just in case you didn't catch it the first time around.

Anyway, I'd be a little skeeved that you find my torrid relationship with Sadiq so important, but hey, I'm not here to judge. [ she might do it anyway but you know. ] But I'd like to know why this is all so important to you.

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

[ Oh no, so much complex English... He's still learning a little so he'll just go with what he got there. ]

A "vampire"?

We made a bet. It is a match. A challenge.

[video]

[shadesofred]

You know. The undead. Blood drinkers. Transform into bats. Creatures of the night, immortal monsters, yadda yadda yadda.

Looks like you lost your little bet. Should've snagged me first!

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

... I have no idea what you are saying.

And I have not lost. You are both lying.

[video]

[scimitar]

Is it really that hard for ya to admit defeat?

[said almost. sympathetically]

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

... [ Yes. So much yes. ]

It is not that. And I hate lies.

[video]

[scimitar]

Yeah? Same here, bucko.

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

I have never lied to you. That is the difference.

[ Watch it, you. ]

[video]

[scimitar]

Don' mean it can't happen!

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

I do not hide my thoughts or words from anyone.

[video]

[scimitar]

That so!

So why's this all so impossible, huh?

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

You had to get ready. You did not do it right away; you planned it out.

[video]

[scimitar]

Doesn't make it impossible.

[video] /quietly admires icons

[eyeforaneye]

You only want me to lose.

[video] HE'S SLIGHTLY CUTE BEHIND THE MASK, OK

[scimitar]

Well, duh! 'S not like I wanted ya to win!

[video] give him credit; it's more than 'slightly'!

[eyeforaneye]

You have not won yet. I will not make things easy for you.

[video]

[scimitar]

How so?

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

You still have not kissed.

She will need to like alcohol...

[video]

[scimitar]

What.

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

... Alcohol. You.

[video]

[shadesofred]

[ Maybe baring her fangs, hissing like the bastard spawn of a snake and a demon, and contorting her face into the most horrifying thing imaginable will help. Even with her transforming powers, it's still pretty effective.

And then she goes right on back to grinning. ]

That's what I'm saying. You're just a sore loser.

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

...






No.

[video]

[shadesofred]

Yes.

[video]

[eyeforaneye]

When I am wrong, I will say so.