discedo | ≈ first breath; voice

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≈ first breath; voice

[Static starts across the voice feed, followed by some mumbling. It seems someone accidentally clicked it on while they were fiddling with the device.]

Dude, do you remember alchemizing these? I don't remember anything like this in my sylladex... Man, speaking of, where is my sylladex?

Why are you asking me? My sylladex launched my sword into the closest tree it could find. Do you know how much of a pain in the ass it was to yank it out with a broken foot? Thanks by the way. I really wanted my toes to get touchy with your hammer. You don't even know. I'm going to get some heinous infection all up in this shit and you're going to have to amputate my foot to save my life or something. Except I refuse, but then we'll get attacked by a swarm of who the fuck even knows and tragically take them down, going down with them. You'll weep over my bloodied corpse. Why Dave? How could you leave me? You were the only bro I could have ever had such a rad bromance with. Now I have nothing. Sweet delicious tears. [Yeah, Dave has no idea where he's going with this too.]

[There's a snort and laughter from the other voice, and even without seeing it's pretty obvious someone is rolling their eyes.]

That didn't even make sense, Dave! But I guess I am sorry that the princess got his foot broken by a hammer that is not even that heavy. Can you ever forgive me?

I take offense to that. How dare you not keep my fragile, maiden tendencies to heart. I have a very delicate complexion going on. But I'll forgive you because I love you. Seriously though, where the fuck are we? I'm two years too early to be wherever we're supposed to be. Fuck if I know. Everything is kind of vague and I think I stopped giving a shit or two since nearly being a victim of trashy novels involving foursomes.

[There's a rustle of fabric. Dave had plopped down next to John, even if you can't see it.] What are you doing?

I am trying to figure out how this thing works. And I am pretty sure I am three years too early to be at the new session. Jade said it would take that long and I just sent you guys that letter. And isn't it kinda weird that we are the only ones here?

[There's more rustling as John fiddles with the functions, turning the communicator over in his hand.] Whoa! I think this thing is on.

Oh my god. You didn't get to see Karkat freak out. It was like the most embarrassing thing. You literally nailed him in the face and he had some major mental breakdown and everything.

Oh shit really? Ok. That's cool I guess. Ask someone where we are. Also if they have a can opener.

Haha, oh man, really? That sounds like something worth seeing! Ok, ok, uhh... Hello? Can anyone hear us? [He's not going to ask your dumb question about the can opener, Dave.]

[ooc| john is in blue, dave is in red!]

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I'm not hopin' for anything. I just won't talk to the guy. If he pisses me off, that's his problem.

... [ Shizuo gives him a flat look and tilts his head. ] ... Those math squares...? I don't like math.

I feel like he's more likely to be pissed off.

No. I wish it were just math, but it's some complex romance bullshit the trolls have. It's really just alien words to me.

He always sounds angry. Really, they shouldn't come around me. Angry people that is. Also loud people. He just shouldn't.

Alien love squares...? [ Sounds complicated; his mind backpedals away from that conversation. ] That's alien business.

You're not a big people person type? I mean, I can definitely understand not wanting to be around Karkat for too long. Living in the same vicinity of him for a year makes you learn more about someone than you care to know.

Basically. It's all a bunch of mumbo jumbo to me anyways.

No. People aren't a big me type. [ Shizuo seems perturbed just hearing him say that. ] I'd end up killing him. [ Or break a few of his bones, he's over-exaggerating... probably. ]

Sounds like it. I don't think I'd want to sit still to learn somethin' like that. There's only love, anyway.

I got thick skin. [Well, he was probably just as insufferable to Karkat as Karkat was to him. Plus, stuck on a meteor with very few people, you kind of want their company while still hating it.] It's important that he doesn't die. It's complicated.

Haha, shit. Don't say that to any of the trolls. If you do, be prepared to listen to how a kismet...kiss...kiss my ass? Shit, whatever. Some stupid black quadrant where apparently it's a type of romance. It's basically rough, hate sex as far as I know.

I'll tell him to stay away from me then. Best if someone filled him in. [ He leaves it at that. ]

Thanks for the head's up. I won't now. [ A pause. ] That anythin' like hatemarriage?

God fucking speed to you.

I guess? But that's only one of four quadrants. But I'm done talking about it because I seriously don't want to even think about this crap anymore.

[ He thinks back to a lovely conversation he had with Terezi. And scowls. Hard. ] Yeah I don't want to hear about it.

Anyway, you guys seem situated. If you need a can opener still, I don't have one, but I can open cans pretty easy.

Other than that, sayonara.

...

Wait, what's your name?

Edited 2012-06-28 12:41 (UTC)

You just offered to open a can with your bare hands. [That is seriously something you offered.] Are you for real?

The artist formally known as Dave Strider. Seriously, Dave is cool. I'm not particularly picky as long as you aren't trying to call me shit like insufferable prick. I don't need that shit.

[ He snorts. ] Yeah. Like I can wait for can openers. Too slow. I don't mind anyway.

[ Nodding, he tilts his head a little. ] Well I'm Heiwajima Shizuo. Shizuo's cool. I'm not interested in callin' people names 'less they deserve it.

Do ya deserve it?

Are you just ridiculously strong or something? Most people do not casually come up to me and tell me they can open my cans via the ripping of the tops with hands. It's usually not standard issue. Hell, this is probably the first time.

[Oh. There's a lot of hard to pronounce names here. Fuck his life sideways.] I like to think I don't. But there's a few people who'd say otherwise.

Guess you could say that. Sorry, I didn't know it was weird thing to ask. [ He's... Really not around people much. He scratches his cheek. ]

Alright, well you don't seem the type right now. So call me what you want, doesn't matter to me.

Well, most people would think you're lying through your teeth that you can rip a can open. I, however, have seen the impossible, so this is pretty much standard for me at this point.

I assume that calling you something ridiculously stupid what get me into a crapton of do not want, yeah?

I don't mind doubt. After seeing personified countries, I'm ready to believe pretty much all the shit I hear.

Let's put it this way, kid. [ Shizuo sighs, waving a little. ] I dont have to demonstrate on a can, you get me?

Shizuo's fine, how's that.

Does anyone know what's up with that? Like, how can a place take an entire country and turn it into a person and toss them into here.

No, I definitely think you can open a can with your hands. I've been traveling with aliens for the past year. I can believe anything at this point.

Yeah, that's cool. It's easier than a lot of the other names here.

Nah, I just believe 'em 'cause it's easier than their explanations. They're sick of it too. I can see why.

[ Shizuo nods, liking this answer. ] Alright, glad we came to a conclusion. How was that vacation? [ Snort. ]

I'd be sick of it too if everytime I'm like "Hey, I'm America" and explain myself without trying to sound like I was on something.

It was terrible. Remember the angry guy I mentioned before? I was stuck traveling with him and a few others for a year. I'm sure you can understand that it was not exactly a day at the park.

I'd probably just end up tossing the people asking outta my sight. [ Sadly, a true fact. ]

... That guy... Kitkat? [ He shakes his head, unimpressed. ] I get that. You got a lot of willpower, huh.

I'd like to see that.

Yeah. Usually, it's pretty easy to stay out of each others' hair, but sometimes he really actually wants to talk. [He's glad that Karkat has none of his raunchy romance novels with him. Hopefully.]

And you probably will eventually. [ A shrug. ]

I can't see that guy talking. Not seriously or quietly.

It's unbelievable how serious he is. Sometimes you wish he was joking around.

As for quiet. You're right about that. He shouts.

The guy should lighten up some. [ Hypocrite alert. ] And tone it down a notch. What's he trying to prove to the whole god damned system?

Assuming he knows how.

I really doubt he's actually trying to prove anything and it's just how he is.

I hate when people don't realize they're annoying.

[ A pause. ] Sorry, I'm complaining too much.

[video]

knightime - 2012-08-11 02:26 (UTC) - Expand

[video]

shortestfuse - 2012-08-11 23:38 (UTC) - Expand

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