discedo | ( video/action ) the latest 4th wall post ever

Major deja vu goin' on. Big ol' influx of people outta nowhere? That sure isn't suspicious.

[ America looks like he's pondering very seriously for a few seconds--like he's trying to remember a dream, but only grasping at faint shadows--but quickly breaks out into a grin. Whatever he was thinking about, it either wasn't important enough to occupy his attention or he's doing a very good job of multitasking. ]

Welp, best get y'all situated huh!

[ He holds up his right hand--scratch that, the fucking chainsaw attached to the stump where his hand should be--and waves. ]

Before I launch into the longest and most unbelievable explanation any of you are gonna have to believe, I gotta ask: if any of you see my hand running around here, let me know. That sucker's devious. But don't worry! It hasn't strangled anyone or touched anyone weird as far as I know!

[ And if you don't run into America himself... well, you're certainly free to run into ~~Thing~~ his severed hand.

Welcome to Hetalia nothing is sense and everything is fuckery. ]

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W-well...not...really... [Actually, his hand has been pretty well behaved it's just the idea of it that kind of skeeves her out a tiny bit...] But you really should go back to him you know! [Obviously this last is directed to the wayward hand, which has ventured out from under the bed and snuck onto the table next to the communicator. If you look closely you can see a thumb that is definitely not Taiwan's.]

Yeah, c'mon little guy! Come back to me!

[ let us take a moment to consider that both Taiwan and America are talking to a severed hand, trying to convince it to go back to its owner.

this is an absurdist reality. ]

[In a coaxing kind of tone] Wouldn't you be happier there with him? It's where you're supposed to be...

[The hand doesn't seem convinced]

[This is why we cannot let Taiwan near hookah, America. If this is what her reality is like...]

Why doesn't he like me?

[ now he just looks dejected. ]

Sure, I broke it a couple times, but that's just part of the hazard of livin' in the fast lane.

W-why are you asking me? He's your hand... [She's just a little flustered, don't mind her tone of voice...]

Because it seems to like you more.

[ yes, he's now pouting because his severed hand likes her. no, he doesn't catch her flustered tone at all. ]

W-well, how am I supposed to know what he's thinking-! It's you and I can barely understand half the things you're saying sometimes-

What? But I say everything loud and clear! I don't talk in fortune cookies like China or [ wait fuck what's Macau's name again ] Kachaw or Macaw, something like that. You know who I mean! Compared to them I'm as straightforward as a Lone Ranger episode.

...Maybe it can sign language at you and you just haven't caught on yet. It could be telling you all sorts of secrets that you don't even know!

W-wait, you want me to know all the secrets your hand is telling me?

[ oh shit he hadn't thought of that ]

W-well. Not the big ones. Like about me. And stuff. Just the stuff about why it doesn't like me.

I still can't figure out if he can understand me even though he doesn't have ears... [America, I don't think you're going about this logically...]

Well, he's gettin' around fine without eyes. Maybe his hearing works the same way?

[Oh yeah-!] M-maybe!

Well um...maybe I can convince him to go back home tomorrow?

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