discedo | ( video; english )

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( video; english )

[ America has been lying low ever since his little "excursion" with Tatsumi. Part of it is because it's pretty awkward to face up to doing terrible things, even if they weren't done by choice, even though he had no control in almost every sense. No matter what though, it's always hard to deal with the consequences of hurting those you care about. So he hasn't. He's been content to sit numbly at home and keep himself together.

But there's another reason.

America now wears a grin that's mostly reminiscent of his usual ones: cocky, self-assured, triumphant. Look closely though--look at the dark circles under his eyes, the healing bite marks on his neck, the bruises, and suddenly that sharp edge to his smile seems a little off. ]

Two weeks! Two whole freaking weeks and there ain't hide or hair of the bastard left! Discedo, I've done the impossible: I've solved your vampire problem. Let this be a lesson to all creatures of the day, night, or otherwise who are getting any ideas about going toe-to-toe with Hero of Hegemony!

[ It is at this point that he holds up his right hand. It's not a hand. It's a chainsaw.

Let's let that sink in: America has lost his hand and now he has a chainsaw in its place.

America has a chainsaw hand. And it works.

This is a travesty against all things sane. A beautiful, stupidly glorious travesty. ]

Mess with me, will ya? Fuck me up, will ya? SUCK OUT MY FREE WILL WITH YOUR VAMPIRE FANGS AND USE ME LIKE A PUPPET, WILL YA? I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY THAT FROM HELL, TATSUMI! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[ The chainsaw is turned on to accompany his near-maniacal laughter for an extra dramatic effect. Bruce Campbell would be proud of this display of lunacy.

After a bit he finally calms down. The smile remains on his face, but it seems a little more forced. ]

Gonna guess being dead for two weeks means he's staying dead for good. All those safe measures I took to make him stay dead, it damn well better work. [ Because if it doesn't... well, he's not sure what he'll do. His smile falters a moment, then comes back a little sadder. ]

And, uh... to y'all that are wonderin', and the ones who saw me... that night. I'll talk! Dunno how ready I am, but it ain't like I'm gonna get any more ready, right? Point is, I'm okay now, you're okay now, everything's okay!

[ Except he's really not. Hell if he'll talk about that though. ]

Oh! And if anyone knows where my hand went, lemme know! Stupid thing keeps running off on me.

[ Everyone might want to check under their covers tonight. You know, just in case a sentient severed hand happens to be there 8))) ~~Why do I write these things what is wrong with me.~~

Also on a quick ooc note! I'm still chipping away at the event log, but if you have any questions about outcomes with your character/plotting/whatev, just drop me a line through PM or plurk or whatever mode of communication is comfortable for you! ]

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[By the Power...Adam couldn't bring himself to turn on the video feed because well...America looks like a madman. And that chainsaw does not help matters. What made him even more nervous was the fact that he was screaming at whoever Tatsumi was and cursing him to Hell?]

[This is the most frightened face of all frightened faces.

WHAT WORLD DID HE JUST GET DROPPED INTO?]

[ A BEAUTIFUL WORLD ]

Something wrong?

[ HE'S NOT SCARY. REALLY.............. ]

[None of that was very coherent. She will not say anything, she cannot say anything that will add to the conversation, but the thought of America with a chainsaw hand kinda fucking terrifies her. Feelings of self-preservation is inordinately higher than any concern about whatever happened to America to make him snap like this.]

[On the bright side, she knows that it isn't her?]

[Yeah, that's not very comforting at all. Still no words. She shies away from her communicator, angling it so he can only see the top of her head at best. Maybe she will take off her nón lá too. There.]

[S-she... will just continue watching his broadcast out of morbid curiousity...]

[Then the idea started to sink in. Death wasn't forever in this place and the person in question was most likely hiding for good reason. Even if he thought the guy was fucking nuts, Alfred was the embodiment of his country so he had to make sure he was alright.

Plus, being on the Watch you kinda have to look into this shit.

So he turns on the video and addresses the nation.]

Stupid question coming from me but what exactly happened?

[s c r e a m!]

N-N-No! Not at all!

[ At this point he's pretty glad that Vietnam isn't asking too many questions. All of his answered would be embellished, of course, but he's not keen on giving out details to anyone. Especially her.

Right now he isn't even sure if this broadcast is from her. STILL. ]

...Hello?

[APPLAUSE]

[ America isn't exactly jumping at the opportunity to tell everyone the details of what happened. Too much painful stuff he doesn't want to think about, trauma he'd rather suppress than deal with, personal weaknesses and shame that he can't bear to show anyone, let alone his own citizens, just too many emotions in general.

So he'll give the simple version. ]

Dumb bloodsucker thought a little hypnosis and fatal wounds would take me down. Hah! What he didn't realize is that justice flinches in the face of adversity!

So the second I was free and got this [ he holds up his shiny new hand ] I took care of him myself!

And I know what you're thinking: but people come back here! They're revived! Yeah? Well I'd like to see them do that without a body!

[A squeak. Does she respond?]

Allo. [why.... she could have just said nothing.....]

Good! [ HE SOUNDS SO NONCHALANT AND... friendly. ] Don't let the spinning blades of death fool ya! I'm a good guy. Just cleanin' up evil, saving the world, nothing outta the ordinary.

[ SEE ICON.

Except with... one hand... and a chainsaw. ]

Thank you, thank you. Just doin' my duty, bro.

Dude, I mean it in the nicest way possible, but you're kinda crazy.

[ Read: If your hand is in my bed, I am throwing it in the lake. ]

Oh. Hey!

[ He actually sounds... well, cheery. Friendly. Strange given his mad rant. The awkwardness of being around Vietnam will likely return soon, but at the moment he's just relieved he doesn't have a vampire on his back anymore. Maybe it's a sign that things are looking up!

(That, and he's not so oblivious that he doesn't think that his new appendage must've made an impact on her. GOOD. ALL MUST ADMIRE HIS GLORY. HE IS LIKE A PHOENIX THAT RISES OUT OF THE ASHES and okay maybe Vietnam isn't thinking of him like that but he's happy in his own little delusions.) ]

Crazy like a fox. Or... wait, a more heroic animal. A bald eagle!

[ You say that as though it won't find its way back. ]

[ It'll have a harder time with a bag of rocks tied to it. ]

Crazy like a bald eagle.

[ Harder, but not impossible. ]

I'll take that as a compliment. Because, obviously, it was totally meant as one.

[ And no one will convince him otherwise. ]

[ /screech ]

Oh yeah, totally. [ Why does he encourage you, bro. Why. ]

If you happen to need to perform another vampiric exorcism or whatever, can you avoid Latimir? Or like, Discedo in general?

[ Because bro needs some happiness in his life rn ok ]

No promises man. I go wherever I'm needed. Like Superman!

[ He'd be doing a much better job of providing it if the entire situation didn't genuinely unsettle him on some level. Hong Kong does not do unsettled. He is very, very settled, it's a staple of his overall physical expression. Sure, the sixties were unstable. And the seventies weren't so solid either. And the eighties, don't even start. The nineties...

Okay, so Hong Kong's not so settled. But he's trying and VAMPIRE ATTACKS don't... help.... Not at all. ]

Yeah, like Superman. I hope they need Superman somewhere that isn't Discedo.

[He can still just see the top of her head, so he can't quite see the horror on her face, although he probably heard it well enough from her voice. Fear dissolves into curiousity.] How did you get... [actually, she isn't sure of the English word for it] that for a hand?

[It is not so much admiration as it is WILL HE TURN AND USE THAT ON HER!? He wasn't above using napalm and Agent Orange on her, so extending that logic, he wouldn't be above using his chainsaw hand on her if he felt provoked...]

[He can think whatever he wants to think that she's thinking. She isn't voicing her thoughts allowed.]

Long story. [ He waves his good hand flippantly. Probably best to leave out the part where Japan cut it off... ] Fought a vampire, lost a hand, needed a replacement. This seemed like the logical option!

[ Wait until she finds out he has a flamethrower. Her life is never allowed to be easy.

Luckily he has no intention of using it on anyone but evil vampires and monsters for the time being. Thinking ahead will only make things messier than they already are. ]

[Luffy doesn't know America that well, but he can easily tell something's wrong. And not just because he's gone completely batshit.]

Just because you force a smile doesn't mean people will think you're okay.

[It's that.] Something bad happened.

[ Sixties country stress + all this personal stress = when is America ever stable. Right now he feels like he's hanging by a very fine thread, but. Not something he really wants everyone else to know. ]

Nah, I'm sure he's off saving Earth and stuff! I mean, everywhere needs Superman, but as great as he is, he's still got his limits, you know? Gotta prioritize things. And luckily, he prioritizes Earth!

I can't even tell if there was a metaphor in there.

[ Slightly concerned.

Okay, slightly more concerned. ] Are you okay? I mean, really.

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[ video? ] this doesn't add anything at all, but alsfhal, thought i'd respond.

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[ video! ] THAT'S FINE /breathes all over your responses †∆†

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