discedo | ( video; english )

[ America has been lying low ever since his little "excursion" with Tatsumi. Part of it is because it's pretty awkward to face up to doing terrible things, even if they weren't done by choice, even though he had no control in almost every sense. No matter what though, it's always hard to deal with the consequences of hurting those you care about. So he hasn't. He's been content to sit numbly at home and keep himself together.

But there's another reason.

America now wears a grin that's mostly reminiscent of his usual ones: cocky, self-assured, triumphant. Look closely though--look at the dark circles under his eyes, the healing bite marks on his neck, the bruises, and suddenly that sharp edge to his smile seems a little off. ]

Two weeks! Two whole freaking weeks and there ain't hide or hair of the bastard left! Discedo, I've done the impossible: I've solved your vampire problem. Let this be a lesson to all creatures of the day, night, or otherwise who are getting any ideas about going toe-to-toe with Hero of Hegemony!

[ It is at this point that he holds up his right hand. It's not a hand. It's a chainsaw.

Let's let that sink in: America has lost his hand and now he has a chainsaw in its place.

America has a chainsaw hand. And it works.

This is a travesty against all things sane. A beautiful, stupidly glorious travesty. ]

Mess with me, will ya? Fuck me up, will ya? SUCK OUT MY FREE WILL WITH YOUR VAMPIRE FANGS AND USE ME LIKE A PUPPET, WILL YA? I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY THAT FROM HELL, TATSUMI! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[ The chainsaw is turned on to accompany his near-maniacal laughter for an extra dramatic effect. Bruce Campbell would be proud of this display of lunacy.

After a bit he finally calms down. The smile remains on his face, but it seems a little more forced. ]

Gonna guess being dead for two weeks means he's staying dead for good. All those safe measures I took to make him stay dead, it damn well better work. [ Because if it doesn't... well, he's not sure what he'll do. His smile falters a moment, then comes back a little sadder. ]

And, uh... to y'all that are wonderin', and the ones who saw me... that night. I'll talk! Dunno how ready I am, but it ain't like I'm gonna get any more ready, right? Point is, I'm okay now, you're okay now, everything's okay!

[ Except he's really not. Hell if he'll talk about that though. ]

Oh! And if anyone knows where my hand went, lemme know! Stupid thing keeps running off on me.

[ Everyone might want to check under their covers tonight. You know, just in case a sentient severed hand happens to be there 8))) ~~Why do I write these things what is wrong with me.~~

Also on a quick ooc note! I'm still chipping away at the event log, but if you have any questions about outcomes with your character/plotting/whatev, just drop me a line through PM or plurk or whatever mode of communication is comfortable for you! ]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Oh gross don't do that sideglance thing. You're my bro! You're better than that!

[ He fumbles a bit and clumsily releases a latch. The chainsaw falls to the floor with an ungraceful thud. America stares at it abjectly. ]

Oops. Hope it ain't chipped or nuthin'...

[ Swaying again, he tries to brace himself with the stump--wrapped in dirty bandages, still bloody--and winces when it hits the wall. Instead he shifts to lean his shoulder against it.

Then the words sink into his mind. At this point his mind is too buzzed to manage misinterpreting anything she says. He cocks his head in confusion (and almost falls against the wall doing so). ]

What d'ya mean? Started with what?

Aw man, I'm right down the hall! Uh, above you. Same building. My embassy. ...Yeah I'll be there in a few.

[ And about fifteen minutes later America comes knocking at the door. Five of those minutes were trying to force himself into a panic attack so he could get it over with before he had to see people again (because that's how this works in America's mind--you get your freaking out out of the way, drain your energy and emotions, then you're good to go, like having a good cry but with more hyperventilating). It didn't work. The next ten minutes were spent composing himself, slapping on a grin, realizing that shit wouldn't fly with Luffy, and finally settling to just brush his goddamn hair so he doesn't look like total hell.

Anyway he's there. Chainsaw hand is on. ]

It's me.

Probably explode in a volcano or something.

[ America breathes a huge sigh of relief when she returns. He smiles briefly--grateful she decided not to avoid him utterly, nervous about how this will all play out--then starts chewing at his own chapped lip. ]

Hey.

[ Now what. ]

You doin' alright?

M-mostly... Um... [Oh god, his hand] So... About...him...

[ THE FUTURE CONFUSES HIM. ]

Well, he ain't here, but even if he was, I don't see a problem! I'd wanna show it off. Like, "Hey! Bro, check this shit!"

[ See icon. }

He might think that you want to test it out on him, though, especially with that mad look in your eyes.

...What did happen to your hand anyway?

Taken care of.

[ Confidence in victory shines through his voice. America even offers a thumbs up with his good hand. ]

Glad to hear you're okay!

[ THANK GOD because if Norway just spoke Norwegian, America would just start saying random words at different inflections to convey a conversation. The closest thing he knows to Norwegian is "lutefisk" so who knows how that'd work. ]

You remember me? Or anything that's been going on here?

It is fueled by my own awesome. Shhhhh don't think about it, just embrace the glory.

[Luffy basically got kinda bored waiting, and was about to go up and just pound on every door a floor above him. But when America knocks on the door, he answers it with a small smile.]

Hey. C'mon in. I've got some booze. [Because... yeah, he knows you're gonna want that. He stares and points to his chainsaw hand.] Are you gonna keep that?

I do not know ya, I am sorry, but I tell by the way ya handle things and that you are mad that you are a Nation too? I have never heard of ya, though.

I do not know what is happening, so perhaps I should find a person who does. {Even as a kid/teenager, Norway is the best troll.}

B-but weren't you... [~~in love~~ is what she's thinking, but ugh why bring up this subject...]

D-doesn't your hand hurt?

[ Tetanus is the least of America's concerns. If he can live through an age where syphilis was cured with mercury on the dick, turpentine mixed with chalk was an acceptable treatment with dysentery, and laudanum was the default "fuck if I know what's wrong" medicine, he'll be fine with whatever the chainsaw hand brings.

Stay tuned Gin, because America isn't going to make a convincing argument for sanity any time soon. ]

He has.

[ He's terse, like he's trying to bite back a memory. As soon as America manages to pushes aside whatever thoughts were threatening to overtake him, he immediately puts on a big grin. ]

But the difference is that time, he came back like a day or so later! Since our streets have been vamp-free for over a week, I'd say he's staying dead this time.

[ For a moment his expression flickers. Fear that she's actually going to ask it, and it's not a question he's prepared to answer. Some grief, too, if you look closely.

He rebounds fast, blinking back the emotional pain that threatens to reveal itself in his eyes. The smile doesn't return, but his eyebrows raise, trying to look as nonchalant as possible. ]

What, this?

[ He holds up the chainsaw. Okay, he does look a bit proud. You just can't help but feel awesome when you look down and realize you have a fucking chainsaw as a limb. ]

Sure did at first! And it did when I drenched in alcohol--man did that sting. Now it's just kinda this dull throb. Not the worst I've felt. I think it'll be feelin' alright by next week at the latest!

And you know what they say: no pain, no gain. This time the pain is definitely worth the game. Like. Man. I'm just astounded how I've somehow managed to get awesomer than I was before.

...how do you brush your teeth in the morning with that on?

Now that's what I like to hear! [ Congrats Luffy, you get a genuine smile from him. It's not big, and it doesn't last very long, but it's something.

He wanders a bit aimlessly before sitting on the nearest surface. ]

Heck yeah I'm keeping it. First, stumps are boring. Second, it's gonna be infinitely useful. Tres, that's three in Spanish. And fourth, it's a chainsaw! I have a chainsaw for a hand! How is that not awesome?!

Harsh isn't what I'm worried about. These other vamps--I'll have to look into them, but as long as they ain't guilty of atrocities like this one, I'll let 'em slide in the name of justice and mercy.

At least until they slip up. If or when that happens, well, hero's gotta do what a hero's gotta do.

Technically a werepire, but it's dead now so it doesn't matter.

Talent.

[ aka he uses his other hand. ]

No offense, but I'd rather have a chainsaw than a hand made outta apocalypse scrap metal.

Are you going to get rid of that soon?

Eh, give it time. Trust me. You'll know me. For now, you can call me either Captain America or Mr. Hegemony. [ he will milk this while he can. ]

Hey, I know what you're going through! All you need to know is that you'll understand everything pretttyyyyy soon. And stuff.

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